Lost in Nostalgia!!!!

Two days back I was in Madurai..... Spending time at my Aunt's home......

Me nd my cousin Venki went out for some time pass......

V went to the place wer i lived wen i was 10.......

The place is still the same..... no advancements at al......

I was completely lost in nostalgia........

My childhood memories were running in my mind like a 70mm flick.......

Ter was a neighbour whom I used to call 'Deepthi akka'......

V two had great fun togrther......

Dunno wer she is nd wat she is doin now.......

I also visited my old school.... My mind was full of the pranks which iplayed wen i was at tat school......

The school has developed a lot.......

Miss all those days now......

A childhood with nothing to worry about......

I wish those days would come back again.........

It's my life......

"It's my life
It's now or never
I ain't gonna live forever
I just wanna live while I'm alive

(It's my life)
My heart is like an open highway
Like Frankie said, "I did it my way"
I just wanna live while I'm alive
'Cause it's my life

You better stand tall
When they're calling you out
Don't bend, don't break
Baby, don't back down"

Thus goes the lyrics one of my favourite number by Bon Jovi 'it's My Life'....

Well u may all think y am penning the lyrics of bonjovi......

I agree with him nd its also my voice......

i follow it nd also advice it to my frnds.....

Yeah it's my life y must i waste it???

I never care abt wat others think abt me cos it's my life......

I enjoy to the core cos it's my life.......

Life is short so i wanna live it up......

If v take life so seriously v can't get outta it alive.....

Y must i change myself for others???

Let them change to suit me......

If i change i won't have an identity at al......

Y must I lose my identity???

Instead i'll lose tat person......

Interesting philosophy na???

never mind......

Haven't lost a person till now cos of my fault....

tats sweet of myself na????

I love to be loved.......

My life is still an enigma to many......

But i give a damn.......

It'll taje a lifetime for a person to understand me completely.......

None understand me cos they never try to......

but I don't care cos it's my life nd am only gonna live it......

My First Crush.......

My first crush was wen i was in my 9th std...... I was studyin at Bell school wer i had very cherishing memories throughout the year.......

Cupid struck his arrows on me wen i was at 9th...... It was my first day in 9th.....

It was like i've achieved somethin...... In my class i saw her.....

Her fair glowing as if the moon on a full moon day..... I haven't seen such a beauty in my life....

"Wen i saw her Ilayaraja's music was playing in my mind 'En iniya pon nilavae'" Dont worry i wont tel lies like these al..... It was like i was struck by a lightening..... For the first time in life i felt tat i should marry a gal like her..... Was in my dreams for abt 10 mins......

Words wont be enough to describe her beauty......

She was very silent nd tat only attracted me to her...... She was on the other hand very jolly too.....I was in my dreamland singing duets with her......

After some ten mins or so my neighbour was shooking me forcibly......It was my turn to introduce myself to our new computer teacher...... "My name is Rajkumar mam", i told...... "ok sit down rajkumar", her voice was like honey flowing through my ears......

Thus goes my first crush....... It was a crush at an age in which i had no mental maturity......

If I think of it now i feel tat i've been very mean falling for a teacher...... But anyway as this is a personal blog i've told openly..... It was after all an infactuation, hormones playin cricket in my body......

Tagged by numbers

Have been challenged for a numbers tag by Arun....... Am giving it a try.......

1--> My First nd only email id i've used this far is rajkumar988@gmail.com.....

2-->Am having two vehicles..... A honda Unicorn nd a Fiat Palio.....

3-->Am now doing my 3rd year MBBS.....

4-->I have changed 4 mobiles till now.....

5-->5 was my most superior rank in my school life.... Achieved it during my 10th......

6-->I've made 6 outgoing calls from morning....

7-->I've made 7 posts in "The Writer's Lounge", an online community wer u can express ur writing skills.....

8-->I've 8 cousins on the whole..... V have a great time wen v all meet..... Love u al....

9-->had my first crush in life..... My computer teacher..... She was indeed very beautiful.... An angel according to me.....

10-->I've 10 blogs in my blogroll...... thought a lot but wasn't able to find any other for 10.....

It was a great timepass...... Thanx Arun for the challenge..... It was damn boring from morning nd this numbers tag consumed 20 mins of my lazy schedule.....

Scrubs

Am gonna start watching the series "Scrubs".....
Heard tat it's great fun watching it.....
Already was addicted to "Grey's Anatomy"..... I saw the first season of it alone some 5 times......
I hope tat Scrubs too is luring me to watch it continously.....
I got bored watching movies...... Having almost watched all the good movies now i have diverted myself towards tv shows......
I'll write a detailed review after watching the first season completely....
Till then adios.....

The girl who felt ignored!!!!

Friends now am giving a try at a very serious tragic stry..... Forgive me if its horrible.....

The narrator of the story is the heroine.....


I've a boyfriend, Jack..... He is a childhood friend of mine nd have been only my friend for the past 8 years..... Only a month back i realised that i've fell in love with him..... I was so shy in revealing my love.... i was worried whether my proposal wll ruin the friendship between the two.....
But i took courage nd proposed him.... He didnt respond at al.....
From tat day on he was the only guy in my life..... But for him may be am just another girl.....

Me: Jack shall v go on to a movie tonight???
Jack: Nope
Me: Y u got somethin to study???
Jack: Nope have to visit a frnd of mine.....

He always does this..... But tat it was as if the sky was falling on me.....
The next day he didnt call at al.... I saw him in the corner of my street with a bunch of gals.....
I was so much filled with anger...... "How dare can he not come to movie with me nd be happy with his other gal friends???"

I saw tat happiness in his face.... it irritated me very much.....
I gathered courage nd dragged him from the group....

Jack: hey y r u behaving so oddly???
Me: hmmm
Jack:Wat dont drag..... spit it out.....
Me: well Jack I love u.....

He suddenly left the place to a nearby shop nd got me a doll.....

Me:Jack....
jack: dont speak a word..... Just take the doll nd head home....

He didnt respect my words..... The three words tat came outta my mouth were meaningless to him.....

Days passed.... I waited for him..... Daily he wopuld stop by my home nd give me a doll.....
Days went on nd on..... 100 days..... 200 days....
Then came my Bday..... I was expecting him to call me...... But in vain he didnt wish me at al.....
tat evening he came as usual to my home nd gave me the doll.......

Me: Jack wait
Jack: what??
Me: do u know wat day is today??
Jack: nope(he told cold heartedly)
Me:Ok leave it tel me "ilove u"
Jack: I cant tel a person tat i love her just like tat..... If u r so desperate to hear it then go for someone else.....

Daya passed again..... One day i got irritated to the core.....
He gave me the doll asusual.... But i threw in over the road nd scolded him very badly.....
He went to take the doll.... I told him to leave it as such nd quit the place.....
But he didnt.....
Wen he was about to take the doll,,,,

HONK HONK

He was hit by a lorry......
tats the last time i saw Jack alive......

After a month of crazy thoughts nd Psychic behavior i entered my room....
I started counting the dolls.... 1,2,3,.......483,484....
Took a doll nd hugged it to my heart.....
"I love u" sounded the doll.....
I took everydoll nd pressed them....
"I love u"
"I love u"
"I love u"......

I was very much filled with sorrow....
Then i took the last doll..... The 485 th doll..... The doll with blood stain....
I pressed the doll.....
"Jo Do you know what today is? We've been loving each other for 486 days. Do you know what 486 is? I couldn't say I love you.... Um... since I was too shy... If you forgive me and take this doll, I will say that i love you... everyday... till I die... Jo... I love you..."

He loved me till his last breath..... Y God i was so rude to him...... I didnt understand his love.....
He can't be by my side, but he loved me until his last minute.......

Wasted feelings

U stand before me with a bunch of carnation flowers.......
U look beautiful in the black dress of urs......
I can see u crying......
I come closer to embrace u......
But am not able to feel touch.....
How can I wen am dead????
I Would have been alive if this had happened 2 days back!!!!!!

My first attempt at 55 fiction.......
Forgive me if its horrible.....
Am really not tat good at writing.......

R u still a single???

This is the question many of my friends ask me......
Is being a single a crime???
There r many advantages of being a single....
1.Ter r no restrictions nd so can enjoy life our own way....
2.Can have many gal friends....
3.Can hang out often with friends.....
4.can save a lotta pocket money.....
5.No hurted feelings at al.....
6.Can write posts like this.....
nd so on.....
So am really proud being a single......

The Unexpected sequelae

The Unexpected sequelae:

An young software engineer moved into the new appartment...... His
neighbour was a beautiful young gal..... The young guy developed an
immediate crush on seeing the gal..... He was so much struck by her
beauty that he was flying in the sky for a moment..... The guy decided
to get close to the gal.....

The next day..... Doorbell rings..... It was the gal..... He didn't
expect this at al....
'Hi am Priya sharma' said the gal.... No reply from the guy cos he
was in his own dreams...... She winked at him nd then he regained his
consciousness..... " am Siddhart sinha..... Welcome to my home" said
the guy...... Priya had brought him breakfast..... Sid was very much
moved by the care of his neighbour...... He took the food nd the both
were chatting a lot.....

Days passed nd the two neighbours became very close..... Sid decided
to get more close with Priya...... One Friday nit the both were having
drinks nd an asusual chat abt matters of least importance.....
Suddenly Sid became so intimate nd approached her to kiss her.....
Priya got tensed nd left the place.... Sid got depressed......

His friends at office on seeing him depressed took him to a bar on the
Saturday nit..... There Sid was drunk to the core nd wen he entered
the dance floor he was shocked like hell......
There he saw Priya as a cabrey dancer..... He got so
irritated......"She behaved as if a pure soul wen I approached
hell..... Bloody slut how dare she insult me..... I'll show her who I
am" thought Sid.....

Late the same Saturday nit wen Priya entered her appartment she was
stunned to see Sid ter..... His eyes were full with lust giving an
erotic stare at Priya..... He caught her nd raped her..... Throughout
the entire nit Priya was opposing him blabbering something..... But
Sid was soooooo drunk tat he didn't mind her.....

The next day wen Sid woke up Priya was not ter..... Ter was a letter
in the table.....
"Dear Sid,
U've done a terrible mistake..... U shouldn't have don't
tat..... Am a HIV +ve patient..... For tat reason only I kept away
from u..... I loved u so much thinking tat u were decent nd not like
other guys in this metro..... But u proved me wrong..... U too r like
the guys who spoilt my life..... I never expected this from u.....
Anyway am very sorry if my beauty has attracted u..... U have a short
lifetime left..... Pls be happy..... Let atleast the person I loved be
happy....
With lots nd lots of love,
Priya......"

Sid was speechless...... He felt bad throughout his entire life......
He diedafter a few years..... Priya is still living somewer thinking
of her one nd only love.....

My true confession.......

April,2008.....
11.30 A.M.....

I was totally bored to the core....... The next day I was having my Pathology internals......
The book was driving me crazy....... So i decided to make a true confession to my cousin sis.....
The following is the extract of the SMS chat between us two.....

M-Me,P-My cousin sis......

M-Hey de u ter???
P- Tel da....
M-I'll tel u onething but u mustn't scold me or whatsoever....
P-Ok da tel wat matter???
M-Ok de..... Am losing concentration..... I feel detached from the surroundings.....
P-Hmmm....
M-I dont like studying at al.....
P-Wats ur final verdict???
M-I've finally fallen in love.....
P- Enna da solra??? dont joke(shocked)
M-Yeah de am not joking..... I've fallen for Ms.Pretty..... U only have to talk to my dad nd convince him..... I can't live without her......

She suddenly make a call......

M-Hello
P-Dai wat r u telling......It'll really become a big problem....
M-It wont
P- No it'll..... Uncle will surely send u outta ur home.....
M-No de he wont......
P-How r u tellin it for so sure???
M-Cos this april
P-Wats the relationship between april nd ur love??
M-Yeah definately.... It's april nd u've been made an april fool by me.....
P-_____
M-Happy fools day......
P- some censored words.....

My cousin was really pissed off...... She got soooo tensed nd scolded me a lot......
Even now if i talk abt this matter she'll get tensed......

The sun is 'koluthing',It's Verthu kotting!!!!

The heading denotes the nature of the summr sun.......
As days pass the intensity of the sun is going on increasing.....
Am not at al able to bear the heat nd my purse is becoming empty To quench my thirst......
The sun this summer is toooooo horrible nd thanks to the great Tamilnadu govt v get a 2 hour power cut per day....... Life becomes sooooo horrible in those 2 hours..... Contradictory to Bryan Adams' 'Summer of 69' I would ''These r the worst days of my life''.......
The summer sun has created a big hole in my purse...... Daily i've a minimum of 3 juices......
Or atleast 2 ice creams...... then only my thirst is quenched......
This has ben the worst summer regarding the climate......
During my childhood days al i used to expect summer....... Cos those wer thge days wer v get leave, go to relatives' home nd to top them am not said to study...... But now as an adult i hate this summer...... The climate makes me go mad...... Not even able to sleep with the Airconditioner turned off.......
Now itself is like this i wonder how the future will be???

Blood Donation

Today a blood donation camp was organised in my college.......
It was a great success but many students didn't turn up.......
I was shocked when i heard tat even students who r gonna be future doctors nd who know the importance of blood donation weren't ready to donate blood...... Everyone was telling silly reasons.....


Even other college stuidents donate more enthusiastically...... I wonder y these guys r like this.....
When they meet with an accident in the near future even they need blood..... How will they be saved if someone refuses to donate blood for them???? They dont even understand this simple logic......

Well blood donation is a heavenly attribute....... Even if u give money to u a person u r giving him food but wen u give blood to a person u r giving him his life back.......
Blood banks r struggling to motivate the youth of our country to donate blood.....
Y doesn;t everyone understand the need of donating blood.......

I saw an ad somewer in the net nd was very much moved by it.....
Saving one's life now, save your own later

So to those who r reading this blog pls make it a habit to donate blood once every 3 months.......
Always have in mind that ur blood u donate saves a life somewer...... This wud give a satisfaction...... Pls understand the need for blood donation nd also motivate ur friends to donate blood...... It'll take only 5 mins outta ur busy schedule...... But have in ind tat u r giving a lifetime to a patient.......
The blood they take outta ur body wil be replaced very soon..... So there is nothin to worry about.......

So,
If u have any doubtsabout donating blood or if u feel tat donation will harm u get counselling from ur family doctor...... No real doctor in the world will tel tat blood donation is harmful......

Is ignorance bliss???

This question have been confusing me from my school days.......
Well ignorance may be bliss or may not...... Its like two parallel mirrors placed against each other...... There is no real answer to this question........
Ignorance is really bliss if v approach it the following way:
1.Will u take the journey if u know it's gonna end??? If u r ignorant of the ending u'll surely pursue the journey....
2.In The Matrix a character named Cypher tells"I know that this steak doesn't exist..... Wen i eat it the matrix tells my mind tat its tasty nd juicy...... After 9 yeatrs u know wat i realise?? Ignarance is bliss"..... Cypher is indeed correct.......
3.A 50 year old man with psychotic problems will have the mindset of a 3yr old child nd would enjoy the life with carelessness nd enthusiasm nd happiness of a 3rd yr old child....... On the other hand a normal 50 yr old man with normal responsibilities would surely have a stressful life......
4.Children r usually very happy because they r unaware of wats going on around them..... as they grow up they learn emotions nd the result is they get hurt.....
5.A woman who has lost her entire family still goes to work nd cooks food for the entire family nd also does shopping for the family thinking tat they r alive....... She is very happy at this illusion..... If she realises the reality all she gets is sadness only....... So ignorance is bliss.....

Ignorance is wen u see a black card alone..... It's not dark unless u compare it with a white card..... This is the difference between ignorance nd education......

On the other hand,ignorance is not truly bliss too.......
Ignorance is like staying in the dark nd having in mind tat being in the dark is the best thing in the world..... But it's not...... It's like cheating ourseles......
Ignorance is bliss because it gives u happiness by masking reality......
But ignorance doesn't gives u true happiness...... True happiness is achieved only by feeling nd not by thought.......
Being ignorant one can never achieve anything in his/her life......
If a person ignorant he'll surely feel the reality once nd will feel a lot for sure......
so one can argue in both ways.....
But i still wonder "is ignorance really bliss???"

Y ain't I a book worm????

I've successfully spent almost two weeks without even opening my books.......
Am in my Ophthalmology posting wer am expected to read daily....... But still didn't even open my book.......
It's a great achievement rt???
During my posting everyone around me reads on nd on...... I on the other hand take my mobile nd pass time hearing songs nd by spoiling others studies......

I wonder y ain't i a book worm just like others..... If i open my book nd read for 5 mins i get sleep as if i heard a sweet lullaby...... Ter is no use being a book worm too...... Both me nd other people in the same posting get the same amount of scoldings from proffessors...... So wat makes a difference????

Unlike other postings Ophthalmology is going on very interestingly...... it's not cos i see cases, it's cos v enjoy the classes teasing each other nd here i must mention abt my professor...... he is a great kadi(a slang word denoting irritaion)..... But v put cross mokkai to him nd pass time......

Me not being a book worm doesn't make any difference...... Anyway watever i read now wont be in my mind before exams nd have to read anew at tat time...... So y waste time reading......
So am not at all worried for me not studying.......

Life as a budding medico!!!!!

To be frank life as a budding medico is horrible.......
Proffessors tel "Study,Take history,Give the diagnosis"
Parents tel"U r not at al studying"
Gal frnds tel "Teach me this,teach me that"
Other friends tel"Macha dont study"
See as a budding medico am supposed to satisfy all these but trust me i've never ever tried to do so......
I can only satisfy my frnds cos am good at not studyin.......

But life as a doctor is great fun....... U get lotta time to hang out with friends,watch movies,Put kadalai(a slang word meaning talking with gals) nd so on.......


When i joined my course many were telling tat engineering is the best course nd that only an engineer can earn money very early....... But thanx to the great economic depression those engineers who once teased me r speechless......

But as a budding medico I get lots nd lots of scoldings at hospital especially during my medicine posting...... after i completed my medicine posting my scolding bearing threshold level increased...... But those were part nd parcel of my college life......

Love too be a medico.......

Mixture of emotions

Saturday, date:Unknown
10;00 AM

Am speeding through the streets amongst the heavy mornig traffic...... The passersby scold me for my rash driving but who cares ter is a gal waiting for me at the other end of the city....... I ignore their scoldings nd keep on driving.......
Finally i reach the ladies hostel..... In the entrance ter she waits, her face red filled with anger.......
Am afraid wat she is gonna tel..... I've made her wait for an hour....... Kudos to the defective alarm i woke up late.......
I convince her to get in my car....... i keep on driving...... she doesnt even open her mouth...... I keep on asking sorry to her nd finally she forgives me telling tat life is nothin but doin mistakes nd forgiving...... I keep on driving for about an hour or so nd finally v reach my friend's home wer v were planning a get-to-gether....... Today was the day am gonna introduce my fiancee to my friends...... V have a long chat...... my frnd's wife has prepared lunch for us......
after the lunch two more friends join us...... then me nd my fiancee leave my frnd's home nd head towards a beach wer i have arranges a dinner beside the shore.......

The same day
6;30 PM

My fiancee was moved by my arrangements nd gave me a warm hug.......
Me nd my gal have a stroll by the shore......

There is slight drizzling nd the surrounding is soooo romantic tat my fiancee tells "u r the most romantic person in the world" nd hugs me again nd comes close to kiss my lips..........

Munbe vaa en anbae vaa plays in the background........ The alarm of my mobile........
I woke up at 7 in the morning wih cherishing memories.......... But the tragic part of the story is that i am not able to remember the face of my fiancee.........

The Past, the Present, the Future

Am a bit bored to the core....... Lying on my bed hearing songs......
Suddenly memoirs from the past come accross my mind...... Both the happy nd sad events of my past came to my mind...... After sometime thoughts abt the future come accross in my mind......
The reasons for these in psychological terms is increased firing of neurons but in my words the aetiology of this is tat am jobless...... Jobless in the sense am a great lazy goose.......

Well tats all abt me....... but if u ask me whether dissecting the past or analyzing the future is essential, a strong "no" will be my answer....... If a person wants to be happy he must never dig up his past nor think abt his future....... The thoughts abt ur past gives u depression nd the ideas abt ur future gives u fear abt life......

The past, the present and the future all point u in different directions....... If u travel through the direction ur present is pointing will surely make u succeed.......
Life is short...... So y should v waste time thinking abt the past or the future...... lets just live the present.......

It's raining outside

Well the title of the post itself has many contextual meanings associated with it......
but as far as i am concerned the title suits my life very aptly......



lets start with my introduction.......
My name is Rajkumar..... Trust me am a budding medico......
Am a sort of guy who never cares abt wat others think......

Here in this blog u can have all the ingredients that make up my life......

This blog may be refreshin like a cup of coffee or may be boring like a drama or may be a good time pass......

It's raining outside......
This is the best phrase that defines my life......
I live a seperate life in my inside which none from the outside know......
well in this blog am gonna write wat ever comes in my mind no matter abt wat am gonna publish it......
have great fun enjoyin my blog.......
Adios......